Whoso would be a man would be a nonconformist. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
We all have our differences, but I have come to the conclusion that some differences are more tolerable than others. I see this when we are in any group situation, even in my church. There are times what seems in vogue for others is just not for us. I take into consideration that change is inevitable throughout every one's life and no one really likes change unless it is his own idea. I would also add that one's ability to adapt to change is an indication of age, not physical age but mental age, so someone who is willing to take on new challenges cheerfully, even with some reservations, is often considered young at heart. That is why I carefully examine if something is a matter of principle for me or just a habit that would be uncomfortable to change, as I do not want to become too set my ways. On matters of principle, I believe one should stand firm despite what other people think or are doing.
We have made some life choices that are a matter of principle for us. I believe these choices make other people far more uncomfortable with us than we are with them.
One uncommon custom we have that seems to bother other people is that we eat organic foods. That is not to say that we expect anyone to go out of their way to serve us organic foods when we are guests, nor does that mean we will refuse their food or that we don't eat out or that we never eat conventionally-raised produce and meat. It merely means that we believe in the health benefits associated with limiting the amount of toxins we consume and support those who farm organically because it is hard work and a commitment to improving our environment as well as their own health.
Homeschooling is a huge wedge between us and most families. Perhaps some think we do it to shelter our daughter and, quite frankly, that is one of the advantages or disadvantages depending on the circumstances and your perspective. The bottom line is we homeschool because God had guided us to do so. This is not a judgment on other families who have their children in schools—my only concern there would be that they were led by God as to where and how they should educate their children, not just because it is free or everyone does it or even because it is the default method of education. If they know it is God's will for them, that is all that needs to be said. If God was never asked, then perhaps He should be...?
I fast one day a week and I fast for longer periods regarding spiritual matters as I am called upon to do so by my Lord. Compared to other places in the world where food scarcity is more common, fasting has become an uncommon religious practice in the more developed, civilized countries where food is abundant, oddly. We read about our spiritual forefathers in both the Old and New Testaments of the Holy Bible, including Jesus Himself, whom we are to strive to be like, and yet our churches do not train or even encourage us about fasting. It is a shame, really, that this is considered unusual in our present times.
There is another thing that I dance around, trying not to offend others or bring too much attention to our family in its regard, but I also believe that the church has become a victim of society's expectations. Families are basically split up whenever they go to church, usually according to age. I accept this for Sunday School, but I don't agree with it for services. In the last few churches we attended, this was not a problem because there was no children's church offered, but that was more due to inconveniences than philosophy, because it would be offered should the church acquire a pastor and space for a separate service just for the children.
Now, for me, I homeschool so I am with my daughter much of the time and we read Bible stories and have devotions nearly every day, so it is not like she has learned anything new in Sunday School, but it is good reinforcement from other teachers and children. However, my husband has often been gone from Monday to Friday, even before this job he worked long hours being on call on nights and weekends with catching up on sleep during the day when he could, so being together on Sundays for worship has always been quite important to us. Hence, we have opposed the now popular idea of "children's church."
I probably am going to step on some toes with this one, but I honestly think it should be important to every family to worship together as a family, particularly when the children are in schools all week. The church seems be trying to mimic an "educational institution" too much, thereby perpetuating separation of the family members, instead of advocating the importance of family members worshiping together in practice. It is particularly important because, according to statistics, family worship in the home rarely happens beyond prayers at meals and bedtime.
One of the changes in my church, which I hoped would not happen, is that we have begun having children's church every Sunday. Apparently, this began while we were in Florida as we missed two Sundays. Last Sunday, my daughter left the service with the other children as my husband did not know for what they were calling the children and I was ill at home. We have discussed this and we are still in agreement about the Princess remaining with us for services. After having been a youth leader for years and seeing the effect on families who go their separate ways as soon as they enter the church doors, I am sadden, but then I knew it was likely to happen.
I think our opinion on this will not be the popular one at our church, but it is just another in a list of things about us that seem to make other people uncomfortable with us. It is not just a matter of resisting change for us, but a matter of principle. I have seen too many families going their separate ways in life. With work, school, extracurricular activities, and, yes, now even church, too many parents do not have time with their own children to parent them. Worse, some prefer even less time with their children than they have. It saddens me so much.
~ My Lord, I pray that You continue to guide the leaders of our church and that only Your will is served in the direction our church is taking. I also pray for the families of my church, that we all grow in knowledge and understanding of You, Our Father, so that we can be the parents You wish for us to be to our children. ~
