Saturday, June 20, 2009

A Haircut Unscheduled


The hair is the richest ornament of women. ~Martin Luther

Since she was three years old, the Princess has been wanting very long hair, even down past her waist, like mine had been in my childhood. I have been willing to help her wash it, braid it, and style it, because I knew how difficult to would be for her to do alone. She is blessed with the shape of face that looks good with just about any hair cut, but long hair seems to be the best choice for her with her silky, straight, thick hair that resists curling.

I was looking at the long straight locks of my Princess when I realized that there was a chunk of hair about six inches shorter than the rest. After some questioning, we found out that one night while she was in bed lying awake, she cut her hair with her own scissors, which were on the bed because they had not been put away as they were supposed to be.

She did this some years ago also. She decided that she wanted to let her bangs grow out, and just when they were finally even with the rest of her hair, she cut her bangs on her own. She even came out to me all smiles and I remember thinking, before the realization set in, that she looked so cute and somehow a bit...different. Uh-oh! It was just after she first started to cut things with scissors and they were supposed to be in a plastic storage box for homeschooling, but she had become quite fascinated with them and had taken them out without my knowledge. I called the salon and made an immediate appointment. Thankfully, the Princess had just cut the bangs and not that badly. There was some that went into one side a bit more deeply, but it was not that noticeable once the hair was styled. To drive the point home about not cutting her hair again, I had it cut much shorter all over, which made her unhappy as it was counterproductive to reaching her goal of having hair so long she would sit on it.

I really did not expect that she would do this again, not at eight years old anyway, but she did. This time it was not bangs. She pulled hair from the back on the right side and snipped off six inches. That would be a year's growth, I explained to her. Since she was truthful when asked about it, she will still go to the church's Father-Child fishing event tomorrow, but all her stuffed friends are off the bed for awhile (so we can easily see what is on it at night), her three scissors have been surrendered to my care for some time, and she is to pay for the haircut with her own spending money.

This was decided, of course, after a long talk about several aspects. We talked about how our Lord gives us guidelines and laws so we know the things we should not do. Yet, there are times we just want to do those things anyway and then we try to hide them even from God, which never works; He always knows. Likewise, parents always find out too.

We talked about how cutting her hair works against letting it grow long. We talked about how we were not angry, just very disappointed and even hurt, because we had trusted her and she betrayed that trust, so that she cannot have scissors without supervision for a long time.

I wanted her to understand the serious side of what she had done, while my thoughts were to keep it in perspective: It's her hair, it's just hair, it grows back, etc., and I am thankful she did not cut up the sheets or her stuffed friends. Then there is the part where I am sad that her hair is going to have to be cut so much shorter.

Since she is focused on "playing mama" lately, I asked her what she would do if one of her "babies" cut her own hair. She said, "Forgive her." Something inside me smiled and thanked my Lord. How can I argue with that?

~ My Lord, this has reminded me how much You lovingly parent all of us. We do so much wrong, but to You it is all temporary and fixable in time, just like a bad haircut. You are ever ready to forgive us and likewise we need to forgive others, if nothing else, we have passed that understanding our daughter. ~

3 comments:

  1. Ouch. I don't think they ever quite grow out of that.





    PS: I have to admit I still do it when I get fed up & I'm too cheap for the hairdressers.

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  2. I cut my own hair for many years when I had it in a shag, still do cut my own bangs in between my semi-yearly cuts, but then I have three variations of hair, nearly straight to very wavy, even curly and a wide range of colors from white (now, but used to be light blonde) to dark ash. It hides imperfections well. However, cutting straight silky hair of one color that needs an even blunt cut is not my thing and so we will be making an appointment to do something with it--maybe. My husband and I have considered just letting it grow out a bit or cutting only about three inches off, as I did not see this for over a week myself, and just braid it or pull it back more often for outings....

    Obviously, I am still thinking over the options.

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  3. I will admit, I did this to myself as a child as well. I Think I was about the princesses age as well, though my hair was already well past my bottom and I was tired of sitting for hours while my mother washed, brushed, combed, and braided my hair so I took the scissors and chopped off well over 12 inches of my long hair, so of course mom had to have it cut straight and it was much shorter..I was never allowed to have hair past the middle of my back after that, the rule was if it was too long for me to care for it had to get cut.

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Thank you fellow travelers for walking and talking with me along this journey.